Fictional Not Fantasy
Fictional Not Fantasy

In this excerpt from Blind Date, Alexis and Cameron meet up in a local coffee shop "Hip Stir" and immediately their interaction gets derailed. Both individual's subconscious hallucinations appear in the forms of their best friends Sarah and Mason who in a surprising turn of events can see each other despite the fact that no one else can.


ALEXIS:                    Cameron?

CAMERON:               Alexis?

ALEXIS:                    Actually, I go by Alex.

 

CAMERON turns to look at SARAH.  ALEXIS walks past him to sit down at the table.  MASON follows and stands behind ALEXIS’S chair, staring at SARAH the entire time.

CAMERON and SARAH talk to the side while MASON and ALEXIS do the same.

 

CAMERON:               What kind of feminist kill joy did you set me up with?

SARAH:                     What the fuck are you talking about?

CAMERON:               She goes by Alex.  You know, like the guy’s name.

SARAH:                     Just sit down and stop being an ass.

 

CAMERON and SARAH continue to talk inaudibly.  SARAH constantly glances back at MASON who is awkwardly fixated on her.

ALEXIS sits playing with her drink while MASON talks at her occasionally breaking his gaze from SARAH.

 

MASON:                    Are you sure you want to do this?

ALEXIS:                    Why not?

MASON:                    I’m telling you this girl is not a good sign.

ALEXIS:                    I’m sure she must be thinking the exact same thing then.  Besides I can’t even see her so I’m sure he can’t see you and I bet she’s not freaking out like you are right now.  So just drop it already.  You’re supposed to be helping me not acting like an anxious puppy for me to look after.

 

CAMERON sits back down and turns to face ALEXIS.  SARAH stares directly at MASON.

 

SARAH:                     I have a feeling you might work better than I had originally intended.

 

CAMERON looks incredibly confused by the comment and ALEXIS takes notice.

 

ALEXIS:                    Don’t look so excited to be here.

CAMERON:               Can’t really say that I am.

 

SARAH smacks CAMERON on the back of the head.

 

ALEXIS:                    Well you’re honest I’ll give you that.

MASON:                    He’s a douche is what he is.

CAMERON:               While I’m being honest, I should tell you, I hate this place already and I’ve only been here for five minutes.

 

SARAH stirs in the background increasingly frustrated. ALEXIS seems slightly amused and only a little angry.

 

ALEXIS:                    Is that so? Any other honest thoughts you want to get off your chest?

MASON:                    This should be interesting.

SARAH:                     (barking over CAMERON’s shoulder) Shut up Cameron.

CAMERON:               Yeah what the hell are you wearing?

ALEXIS:                    (offended) What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?

CAMERON:               Most people try a little harder when they’re meeting someone for the first time.  What is it? Am I not worth impressing?

ALEXIS:                    Some people try a bit too hard don’t you think?

CAMERON:               What’s that supposed to mean?

ALEXIS:                    It’s a first date, not a job interview.  I could have been dressed much worse.  Besides, you look like a walking advertisement for some dumb frat line.

CAMERON:               Guess I’m going above and beyond with my job then.

ALEXIS:                    Don’t try to tell me you’re some type of model.

CAMERON:               For now, until my acting career takes off.

ALEXIS:                    You’ve got to be kidding me.

 

SARAH pantomimes bashing her head on a table in the background.  MASON laughs.

 

MASON:                    (to SARAH) I’m assuming you’re here to help him, and you’re doing great.

SARAH:                     (to CAMERON) Like you’re doing any better.

MASON:                    I told Alex to leave before this even started.

SARAH:                     Oh, that’s nice she really listened to you didn’t she.

MASON:                    Where’d you dig up this scumbag anyway?

ALEXIS:                    (Annoyed, at MASON) Shut up.

CAMERON:               Excuse me?

ALEXIS:                    (stammering) Oh no … I didn’t mean.

CAMERON:               Fine you want to talk?  Tell me what it is you do for work then.

ALEXIS:                    I’m an associate director at …

CAMERON:               (cutting her off) So you’re a boring office type.

ALEXIS:                    (offended) I’m a …

CAMERON:               You’re a stuffy workaholic who is still single because she spends way too much time at her job and doesn’t see a reason in dating. Probably spent the last few years climbing the corporate ladder and complaining to your friends about how guys just don’t get it.  But now you’re pushing thirty and your friends and mother are all breathing down your back that if you don’t settle down and have kids soon it’ll be too late for you. Right?

MASON:                    (laughing) Holy shit.

 

SARAH tries to smack CAMERON on the head again but misses when he leans forward on the table.

 

CAMERON:               Let me guess Sarah convinced you to meet up with me so that you would go out and do something for once.

ALEXIS:                    Actually, I go out a lot.  Sarah was just convinced we needed to meet each other.  Though now I’m pretty sure it was so I could kick your ass - not so that we would date.

CAMERON:               Like you could kick my ass.

ALEXIS:                    You never know, I could be stronger than I look.  (pauses leaning back in her chair) So what did Sarah say to get you here?

CAMERON:               That you have nice tits.

 

MASON starts laughing uncontrollably.  SARAH grabs the back of CAMERON’s chair.

 

SARAH:                     I said no such thing.

CAMERON:               I have to say, I’m not impressed.

 

SARAH smacks the back of CAMERON’s head.